Its been a long time since I posted....things got well holiday crazed around here that is for sure.  I was having some medical issues that hopefully I will get around to posting about then just getting ready for the holidays with two small children is always crazy.  Plus if I am being honest I was having a real hard time without having my dad around.  

Now up until the week before Christmas I was doing ok with everything.  Work was good, kids were good. weight watchers was good.  Then all the balls up in the air started to fall and well.....hit me on my head! 

A long time ago someone said to me as hard as the first holiday without your loved one is hard-the second one is worse.  I definitely don't think it was worse just more permeant in a way.  Just the reality of him being gone as really begun to set in.  It is almost as if I head my breath for the whole first year dealing with all of those firsts but now it is the reality of the loss is starting to set in.  Its not harder it is just different.  Sometimes the gravity of the loss is really hard.  Lately Josie has been talking about my dad and how she misses and her memories of him.  Thankfully her mentioning him doesn't bring me instantly to tears....but it does hurt at the thought of how much he is missing each and every day.

The holidays round these parts were good.  We had a nice time celebrating with family and friends and the kids were spoiled rotten.  Mainly what I am looking forward to is some quiet time with the family at home.  

I didn't even take that many pictures this year....not because I didn't want to but because I was busy enjoying.  If one thing the loss of my dad has taught me.....life is far to short to spend my time doing things that don't bring me joy.  

I hope you and your family enjoyed your holidays!